Transforming our triggers will free us from reacting to other people’s inappropriate comments. We might still be annoyed, but we’ll get our power back, we won’t be dragged down to their level. A trigger is activated inside of us and we feel we have to protect ourselves. We sometimes blame, criticise or can even attack the person who offended us. The more we practice and transform our emotional triggers, the more emotionally free we will be. Healing unwanted habits is not always easy, especially if we’ve been hurt in the past and these inappropriate comments bring up hidden memories [...]

Something happened to me recently that reminded me of the importance of the 5 Languages of Love – and it got me thinking about how a lack of the right kind of love manifests itself and what you can do about it. Let me explain…. Since starting up my business, I have wanted to be featured in Muddy Stilettos (muddystilettos.co.uk), a brilliant local guide that started as a fantastic blog covering Buckinghamshire and Oxfordshire, and that has now grown into a multi-territory UK franchise. When Hero, the editor, agreed to have a treatment with me to then write a review [...]

Feeling stuck in a rut is overwhelming, confusing, draining and extremely stressful.  Sometimes its hard to imagine how we will ever get out of it. The human ‘hierarchy of needs’ is a useful, simple and highly effective tool to help us understand why we are stuck, and how to move on.  The diagram below shows our needs in order of priority (with our essential requirements shown at the bottom of the pyramid). Unless those most basic of needs are met, we simply cannot reach the higher levels of self-fulfilment.  And once we have reached a level, we may not always remain there. [...]

The human race has evolved over the centuries, living in tribes and to this day, we still need the sense of safety we get from our ‘tribe’ of friends or family. We fear rejection and can find it difficult to cope with being alone. It is so important not to underestimate this profound human need.  Ultimately a feeling of ‘not-belonging’ can lead to a sense of loneliness or inferiority, which in turn can have a direct impact on our self-esteem.  At one point or another we’ve all experienced a desire to fit in and be accepted by others.  It helps us see value [...]

As our children approach the ‘exam’ time of year, it is crucial to keep an eye on their anxiety levels.  Anxiety can lead to poor academic performance and under-achievement, even in the most capable of students. When children get stressed and worried, their sleep can be disturbed, which leads to irritability and an inability to focus. This in turn can cause panic and has been known to lead to depression in some cases. It is important to remember that this stressful period WON’T last for ever, and that once the exams are over, the stress will ease.  It’s also worth [...]

When we focus on something, we attract the subject of our focus into our lives.  Focusing on the positive brings us great things, but focusing on all things negative attracts exactly those negatives into our lives. I have experienced both sides of this particular coin, both personally and also with my clients.  There is no escaping from the fact that the way we feel will ultimately affect the way we behave.  Some of us have become ‘hard-wired’ to focus on the negatives. The good news is that we can easily learn the skills we need to change our ways [...]

The thing is, the more we worry about the things that could go wrong, the more anxious we feel in the present.  If you recognize yourself in the above, you are what psychologists call a ruminator (an over-thinker). Ruminating on stress and disappointments can be harmful to your health and relationships. When we find ourselves in this state of mind, we often push away those that we are worrying about or seeking love from. We become anxious, negative, depressed and not very pleasant to be around. This is not something that we can turn on or off, but skills [...]

Maybe you decided not to make any this year, or perhaps you made a few that may have already started to slip by the wayside.  If so, you’re definitely not alone! But why do we tend to lose motivation so quickly?  The answer’s in the question…Why?  I’ll explain. As we emerge from the hectic whirl of Christmas, before we know it we are suddenly expected to publicly declare what we want from the year ahead and to have it all planned out!  So we dash off a list of goals, without giving them due consideration. In fact, this quieter [...]

Our critical inner voice can have a devastating effect on us, leading to low self-esteem and a debilitated self-image. It’s important to take a moment to reflect on how strong a critical inner voice we have.  Are we permanently berating ourselves for our guilt, our shame, our wrongdoings - and how does this make us feel? A critical inner voice is a bit like poison ivy, invading us on the sly and then attacking, blaming, comparing and criticising.  It can be abusive and judgemental, leaving us with the overwhelming feeling that we are not good enough.  We may listen to it for so [...]

We all have dreams.  Some of us dream big, and others dream small.  Either way, dreams and goals are a very important part of all of our lives. We often link our happiness to achieving these goals, and they have a significant impact on our self-esteem. For example, the day we feel like giving up, and then pull ourselves together and carry on, is the day we develop a strength we didn't know we had within us.  This strength never leaves us, and we build on it day after day and week after week.  It is this journey towards our goals [...]

Well believe it or not both my daughter and I became addicted to taking one straight after waking up. It is now part of our little routine. I used to wake up earlier and prepare them but after 4 weeks away from home, she missed them so much, she surprised me by getting them prepared before I even got out of bed. They are warming to the body, something you will experience first-hand when kicking back 2 oz of this nutritional gem. Before going any further believe it or not they are alcohol FREE! In fact they are massively [...]